We've been together for...

I've been into Thomas The Tank Engine since a very young age- I was as young as two years old when I first started becoming Thomas-obsessed, so James and I met very early on into my life! Unfortunately for me, I have very few childhood memories left, so it's impossible for me to know if James was my favourite character, even back then.

Nearly 20 years later, I decided to get back into the TV show for a variety of reasons, and while my first exposure to the series unfortunately was the Big World! Big Adventures! reboot, I eventually found my way back to the original model series not too long after. Admittedly, James wasn't a character I thought a whole lot about at first, until around early 2024! I say this is when I started to really fall in love with him because it was the first time I made a tweet about him on my main locked account, so that's when I consider our anniversary to be (which is on March 31st, 2024, by the way!)

As soon as I started to think more and more about James as a character, it was clear to me that he would become one of my most adored fictional characters. I guess I just never expected things to become as serious as they did, to the point where he was the reason why I discovered my semifictosexuality!

Don't worry, I know how weird it is for me to be so in love with an anthropomorphic steam locomotive, but I think that's part of the appeal for me! As well as being semifictosexual, I'm also objectumsexual, and I think The Railway Series and Thomas The Tank Engine, by extension, are pieces of media that I feel truly exemplify what the relationships between engines and humans would be like if the engines were alive. They have the same motivations and values that a real steam locomotive would have if it was able to speak, being more concerned with being useful than they would be with having free will. People mistakenly see the franchise as being 'authoritarian' as a result, since the engines desire to be used by the humans that they serve, rather than wishing that they could be more than that. They know what their purpose in life is, and that is to be useful to the people who make and operate them.

Outside of that, however, I think James is just such a funny and adorable character! He's an asshole at times, sure, but I think there's so much to love about him and his splendid self! He's absolutely a flawed character, and this is made explicitly apparent throughout the entire franchise, but that doesn't stop him from being loved by his friends, even if he often drags them into trouble of his own making...

I also like to think that he's a much more vulnerable and insecure character than he makes himself out to be. In the episode James The Second Best, this is put on full display when Edward is chosen to be on a poster to represent the North Western Railway, leading James to try his hardest to be on the same level as Edward to prove to himself and others that he, too, can (and should) be the railway's poster boy! Naturally, of course, this backfires severely on him when he crashes into the very billboard that has Edward's face on it, but I think it goes to show that James experiences a good amount of insecurity behind that vain facade of his. I think this makes him more relatable and grounded as a character, and I wish the series was more willing to pull back the curtain of James' big ego, because it makes him that much more interesting! There's also something to be said about how, despite being valuable in the fact that he's probably one of the most versatile engines on the island for being capable of pulling both passenger coaches and freight cars, James still feels the need to prove to everyone that he's bigger and better than he really is.

James is also the Roger Rabbit to my Jessica Rabbit, as he makes me laugh and smile anytime he's on screen! There's no shortage of silly antics with James, because he's just that desperate to prove to himself and others that he's a hot shot. James is just a very funny character, and even if I wasn't able to speculate on how his insecurities affect him, I'm sure I'd still love him for the sole fact that he makes me happy!

My relationship with James is one that feels very real, and it's one that I do take seriously to an extent. That being said, however, there's a clear difference between the relationship I have with James, and the one I have with my real life partner. With my partner, it feels very much like they're my future, and they're the person I plan much of my life around. They're my life partner, the one I intend to go through everything with, and nothing is going to change that. With James, however, it's a lot harder to describe. While it does feel real, it's also something I know exists largely in my head. If anything, I'd describe the difference as being that James is my current, while my real-life partner is my future.

I do also consider myself polyamorous, as I not only would see myself dating multiple people (if the opportunity ever came to me), but also because I see my relationship with James as being pretty close to that of a real relationship! I also do have other characters I selfship with, and while the majority of said ships are mostly for fun and comfort, I feel deeply about my relationship with Richie Tozier specifically. However, with him, it's mostly related to me being a fictional introject and feeling as though my soul is tethered to his.

Unfortunately, due to my chronic illness leaving me homebound for 75% of my time, I don't get to go out with James much, if at all. However, in the few chances I have taken to go out, James (his toy form, at least) and I love going to the local pinball arcade together! He's also ventured with me to several furry conventions, though he often stays in my bag most of the time, since I fear losing any of the items I have in my collection.

(Put more here eventually...)

To be quite honest, my self-insert really only exists for creative writing purposes and to interact with other self-shippers, as I see my real, current self as being James' boyfriend! That being said, here's some information about my S/I.

Angelo Keenan, born 1927, is a Sodor resident in his mid 20's. Having been born with a mysterious chronic pain syndrome, Angelo required persistent medical attention. Growing up, he would also realize that he's gay, and lived a fairly lonely life as a result of being a closeted gay and Autistic man.

As a kid, Angelo had a fascination with the trains of Sodor's railway, and dreamed of becoming an artist who's job it was to paint the trains he saw chugging on the rails near his childhood home.

It wasn't until one fateful ride on James's coaches when he was making a routine trip around the island to visit one of his doctors, that Angelo started to catch feelings- something that confused him greatly. Nonetheless, he was enamored, and began booking tickets just for the purpose of getting to be in James' presence.

To be continued...

Just for fun, here's some trivia about my self-insert!